Change on the Horizon and Settling into a New Normal

Dropping off the girls for their first day of preschool was hard. While, in theory, they had been asking to go to school for months (something about school busses, of which there are zero here ... *that* was not fun news to break), when push came to shove and they realized they would not be by my side for an entire three hours, they were less keen. I, however, was keen so after I peeled all three girls off of me (with the help of several teachers), I kissed them all and did the brisk walk off the premises. Did I cry? Nope. Maybe that sounds odd (because I know lots of moms who do), but I didn't and I really believe this little break three times a week will do the world of good for all of us. I was told it took them exactly four seconds to calm down, stop crying and they had a great day. Already, the girls have made a few more friends, talk excitedly about their day's there, and I've expanded my community of great island moms. Did I mention how lovely it is to spend 2-3 hours alone a few times a week? It might not seem like much, but to me, it's the equivalent to a five day stay at Fijian all inclusive. That is how rejuvenated I feel. Breaks are good. So is not having three (adorable and lovable) toddlers nipping at your heals at all hours. That s*** can really grate at your nerves.

Them waddling down the docks together in their backpacks will forever be etched in my memory as one of the cutest images ever.

They will attend their little school three times a week. Despite our 6/6:30 am wake-up time, getting all three of them out the door by 9am is a struggle. Come to think of it, a whole lot of my life with our three girls feels very much like herding cats. It's infinitely worse now that the twins have very distinct opinions on what to wear, eat and - in general - how and when to do things. Oh, toddlerhood. It's the best of times and the worst of times all rolled into one. On the one hand, it's my most favorite stage ever because they are so cute and chatty and funny and adorable. On the other hand, we have the tantrums, meltdowns, and general lack of impulse control. It's full-on. One moment we're hunky dory, the next it sounds like I'm pulling our their fingernails one by one down here. Thank god we have great neighbors who either pretend not to care or have a lot of empathy. I get a lot of gently delivered, "You're doing a great job, mom" comments from friends around us. That's when I know they heard me lose my s***. Good stuff.

So, school... the girls are still not at the point where they run up to the gate excitedly, but I think we're getting there. It's only been four days....Mira is pretty much a Cat 5 clinger during each drop off which is hard, but she is our most sensitive and cuddly one so it was expected. Haven, of course, is the least effected and while she does shed a tear or two, it's manageable and all I need to do is offer an after school treat as a bribe and she's good. Isla, for the most part, loves it and her new friends. Hearing all the kids excitedly say, "Bye Isla" in unison when she leaves is the cutest thing ever. I feel 100% good about this decision and I'm told it will get easier and easier.

What else, what else, what else...? (Scratches chin) OH YEAH. We bought a new boat.

Yep. 

We bought a new boat. (contains excited squeal of utter glee).

We are now the proud owners of a bee-you-tee-ful three cabin Tayana 48. I have a whole post on the how's and why's and what's, but this boat is a huge development and I honestly think it's going to change our life. I realize how ridiculous and dramatic that sounds but it's true. A family of five in a two "bedroom" boat is tight to say the least and while there are many families out there would would make it work and thrive in such an arrangement, that is not us. We always knew a bigger boat was in our future so when I found s/v Legato online and the stars aligned that we could check her out, we moved and we moved fast. Anyway...more on that later but you have no idea how excited we are about this change. It's like a million Christmas Eve's (before you found out the truth about Santa) rolled into one. If you are interested in checking out pics (aka "boat porn") check out our >>>Facebook Page<<<.

As such, this boat will be for sale shortly. If you know any one in the market for a very well equipped Brewer 44 sitting pretty smack-dab in the middle of the beautiful Caribbean, send them our way. We've already got a bunch of inquiries so that is fantastic, but the more word that gets out the better. We don't want to own two cruising boats for too long, that's for damn sure. I'm working on a proper listing but for now, here's some info about our boat: >>>>OUR BOAT FOR SALE<<<<. We will probably be listing with a broker soon so if you want to strike while the iron is hot and keep the middle man out, now's the time.

Scott is as busy as ever on >>>our biz<<<. Owning a (very busy!) business is incredible and wonderful, but it's a crap ton of work and - SHOCKER - it literally never stops when you are the owner. Scott has been pulling eighteen hour days and works seven days a week. The poor guy rarely gets a break and yet never complains. He's working very hard on a better "work-life balance" for both our family and the folks we employ - so he's getting systems in place to streamline things and make sure we can all play hard after we work hard. It's all about balance, right? Easier said than done but that is the goal.

We are settling in for a wild and crazy ride the next couple of months as the season gets into full swing and our new boat gets delivered (early to mid December). Merry Christmas to us! I will keep you posted.

Halloween, Island Style! While we did not get to go trick or treating door to door (not really feasible here) - the girls attended THREE incredible Halloween parties with their school and friends. They had a blast!

This post was brought to you by preschool.

Living Afloat with Littles: Is Raising Toddlers Harder on a Boat?

When people find out that we live on a boat with our four year old and two year old twins, the overwhelming reaction is one of shock quickly followed by disbelief and then wonder. "You live on a boat with those girls? There is NO way I would be able to do that!" they say. "But, wow... Good for you!" Then they think for a second and an inquisitive look crosses their face as they finish with, "What's it like?" I am here to say that, yes, living on a boat is certainly different than raising kids on land, but it's not necessarily as demanding as you might imagine. In many ways it *is* harder, in some ways it's easier and in others it's exactly the same (i.e we still deal with tantrums and meltdowns, we are constantly operating at a base line of exhaustion, and the conundrum of what in the h*ll to cook for dinner is a daily struggle, to name a few.) Scott and I have lived aboard since 2010 and taken several substantial "land breaks" in the states during that time, so we have experienced each lifestyle with our family. Just like everything, there is a yin and yang balance of plusses and minuses to both so the answer to the title question isn't a simple "yes" or "no"...

***

WHAT'S HARDER?

The real differences lie not in the fact that we live on a sailboat, per se, but are a family of five living in a >>"tiny" home<<. There are definite challenges to this arrangement...

Lack of Space: Captain Obvious here! We live in a two "bedroom" boat that is slightly larger than an average sized RV. At forty-four feet, >>our boat<< is by no means "small" for a cruising monohull (in fact it is pretty average), but a) most cruisers are couples and not families and b) our livable square footage is actually less than an average home's living room. It's...cozy. Our twins share a room (and to call it a 'room' is laughable) and Isla sleeps in >>a make-shift bunk bed we created in our walk-thru<< to the aft cabin. We have almost zero privacy and no doors except for those on the twins' room and our bathrooms. Our communal living space is halved when we raise up our (folding) dining table and if we are all aboard, we are - quite literally - tripping over each other. Hosting out of town guests? Forget about it, we simply do not have the space.

This is where they play most of the time. Note that if I need to go to the bathroom, galley, nav station or cockpit I must step over children.

Fewer Amenities: We don't have a microwave, a dishwasher, or a washer/dryer. We have no television. Storage space is hugely truncated as well; we don't have a large pantry, closets or spacious cupboards to store food and gear and instead rely on awkward spaces behind cushions and under floorboards to squirrel things away. Our refrigerator is a glamorized cooler and the act of packing and unpacking it requires a zen level of patience and serious Tetris skills (neither of which I possess). We have no adequate indoor bathtub or shower, and thus must bathe and shower outside on deck or walk to the marina showers a few docks down (not always realistic or convenient with three little kids in tow!) All of these things make day to day living just a little bit harder.

No Dedicated Play Area: Most homes have a dedicated play space for their kids, it might be a basement, a child's bedroom, a playroom or a back yard. In this area toys rule the roost and kids are usually free to make a mess at their will, play safely, and - in most cases - out of their parent's way. We do not have this luxury. There is no dedicated area for the kids to play on our boat, they play in the salon which also is our dining room, living room, office and recreation room - meaning to get from point A to point B at any given time, I usually have to step over an array of play things and a child or two. There is literally no escape!

Our table which does duty as our craft area, stage, fort (underneath) and also happens to halve our salon space.

No Personal/Entertainment Space: Personal space? What's that? Pile on's aren't the exception, they are the rule on our boat! Joking aside, we are more or less a "one room" house and getting away from one another is pretty much impossible on our boat. It's very easy to get overwhelmed when the girls are fighting and there's only one place to put them - or me - in a time out, and our very close proximity (and the fact that we have two year old twins!) means things go from cool to crazy very quickly (and by "crazy" I mean bat-sh*t crazy!) We rarely host play dates because our three girls alone fill the space and any more kids just gets nuts, and having friends over for dinner is almost impossible with sleeping children around. We also run a >>very busy day charter business<< and Scott does all the admin for that...when he needs our boat to double as his 'office' during the day, the girls and I must make ourselves scarce because it's impossible, literally impossible, to work alongside three very active little girls in a small space.

Yeah, attempting to get work done with three toddlers in a communal living space is pretty futile.

Safety: Ah, the issue of safety. By nature I am not a helicopter mom, but a boat floats which means we are surrounded by potential hazard and I cannot give them the freedoms I would if we lived on land. Of course we have >>taken every precaution to keep our girls safe<<, just as any parent would, but, unlike a parent who can feel safe letting their kids run free in their fenced-in back yard, we do not have that luxury. If our girls are on deck, they must be monitored. Until >>they can all swim adequately<< this will be an ever-present issue and it just goes with the territory. And can we talk about getting all three of them on and off the boat?! Phew! It's like getting three kids in and out of carseats...but harder. Lifting three toddlers on and off a boat 3-4 times a day? That's a CrossFit workout right there!

She climbs up here by herself. She's two. Our adventurous kids keep us on our toes!

The list goes on.

The challenges are there and they are real.  There are times when an extra bedroom, an office, a comfy couch in front of a flat-screen t.v, a playroom, locking doors, a garage and a backyard would be positively lovely.

BUT...

The world is our oyster (how many homes do you know >>can up and sail to another island<<?) and the challenges of living small also bring forth many benefits....

WHAT'S AWESOME?

Family bonding: Our girls are never more than ten feet from my person, so I always know what is going on and simply being close to them means I am always there. This might not seem like a big deal, but our close proximity to each other day in and day out is fostering strong familial bonds as a direct result of this togetherness. So. Much. Snuggling! Our girls are sisters, playmates, and bunkmates and are leaning >>valuable lessons<< in side-by-side playing, personal space, cooperation, respect for another's space and conflict resolution because of this. Being so close in age means they often play with the same toys exacerbating these lessons and life skills. Of course this closeness also results in epic cat-fights, tantrums and ear-piercing meltdowns, but - hey - they are laying some pretty solid ground work and it is my belief that, in the long run, being physically close as a family will result in emotional close-ness later on (>>crosses fingers<<).

Grainy pic, but this is a pretty standard morning shot. We all pile into mommy and daddy's bed and cuddle. 

Less to Clean: It's true that messes are quick to be made in a very small space, but they are very quick to be tidied up as well. It literally takes me all of ten minutes, tops, to clean up our entire living space after a couple hours of play. Crumbs on the floor after lunch? My trusty dustbuster will clean up the whole floor in five minutes flat! The girls are learning the importance of playing with a few things at a time, putting those things away, and playing with something else. Of course they are kids and make a mess and have fun, but because every toy has a place, they know to clean up after themselves. Most of the time. ;)

This is a game they love to play. I'm not sure what it is, but they set up chairs with pillows and blankets, and sit there. 

Less stuff : The >>benefits of owning less stuff are vast<<. While we are by no means 'minimalists', the simple act of living on a forty-four foot boat means we have less than most because we simply have less room. This goes for toys as well. Having fewer toys means our girls are more imaginative with >>what they do have<<, and I believe that this has honed their self-entertainment skills and creative ability. They can quietly sit alongside each other and play - together or alone - for long stretches of time with the toys that they have and when those get old, their imaginations start to soar. Pillows, blankets and the most mundane things become forts, gowns and spaceships. Watching them play together is such a joy for me. And while we do watch the occasional movie on our computer, and I certainly see the value of utilizing the iPad from time to time, we do not have television and I strongly believe that limiting screen time has also helped foster their ability to self-entertain and be creative with play, and each other.

Their sisterly bond and friendship is something that is very important for me to help cultivate if I can.

Multicultural Experience: We live on a very small island where a multitude of nationalities reside. Every day our girls interact with Dominicans, Puerto Ricans, Jamaicans, British, French, Guyanese...the list goes on. Living at a vibrant and very popular marina means they meet new people - and hear a litany of dialects and accents - every day. They greet the lawn workers with the same respect as the general manager and every week, they share the swimming pool with local islanders with mental and physical disabilities ranging from downs syndrome to autism. Our marina is a magnet for young people - local and expat - and our girls play with kids of all ages regardless of social class or skin color. This sort of exposure is helping shape their world view and, hopefully, helping to create more worldly, tolerant and compassionate people.

Our resident coconut man, we love him! Each time we see him we get water nuts, fruit and hugs!

Safety: I mentioned the fact that being surrounded by water is a safety concern, and it is. But in many ways I feel safer on our boat with our girls than I do in most homes. Boats, by nature, are actually pretty child-proof. All cupboards on a boat are self-locking which means our girls can rarely get into places they aren't supposed to, so the fear of them getting into cleaning supplies or medicines is highly unlikely. Furthermore, our girls are bonafide monkey's who love to climb and test their limits (a skill and curiosity I fully encourage and rarely dissuade), and - on a boat - there's no chance of a television, dresser or armoire toppling over on them. And, again, the fact that they are never more than ten feet from my person means whatever trouble they can get into, is often discovered very quickly.

She is our resident Denis the Menace. Her spirit is wild and her mind fearless. She is awesome.

Outside Everyday: Living in a (relatively) small sailboat forces us outdoors a lot more than we probably would be if we lived in a house and had more space. More time outdoors means more time in nature, more vitamin D, more interacting with the natural environment, socializing with our community and neighbors, and more time swimming, running, digging and playing. >>All good stuff<<, for sure! I never feel isolated as a "stay on boat" mom because all I need to do is get off the boat and walk the dock for a moment before I can talk to a fellow mom, vacationer, cruiser or friend. What we lack in organized structures like museums, play parks, and activity centers (because there are not many of those things here!) we get in nature. We have our choice of beaches to explore, islands to visit, and water activities to indulge in and we love that. We spend our days playing and not rushing from organized activity to organized activity. Instead of constantly being entertained, our girls are learning to entertain themselves.

Trying to find indoor pictures for this post was hard because 95% of our waking hours are spent OUTSIDE!

Community: This has more to do with where we live on our boat than the fact that we live on a boat, but - still - it's worth noting. As I mentioned above, living "small" means we get out a lot more. Our girls live in a "neighborhood" (marina) where we know just about everyone, by name, and each day our kids are hugged, greeted and held by a whole slew of familiar faces from the maintenance men to taxi drivers to the restaurant waitstaff. Everyone has an eye on our girls and we all help one another out. Islanders live and understand the "village mentality" which is really refreshing, particularly for parents like us who have >>"free rage" tendencies<<. The restaurant staff will tell my kids to behave and the dock assistant will grab a child that's run too far from me and bring her back with a smile. We have neighborhood kids as babysitters and to summon them all I need to do is walk around the docks and find them. Our girls join us at happy hour where they are greeted by all our friends and every Friday we enjoy a giant beach BBQ with fellow islanders and marina guests. It's awesome.

***

The bottom line, and one that I have preached many times on this blog, is that little children are completely adaptable and as long as the parents can adjust (and this here is the tricker part!), living on a boat is very do-able with kids. Some things will be easier than you expect, some will be tougher - but one thing is certain, parenting is hard work no matter where you are.  You will need to find your own groove, develop your own systems and do what works for you. This lifestyle is most certainly not for everyone and while it works very well for us and our family (most of the time...), there are just as many people who wouldn't last a week living like we do. Some people thrive living in a city, some prefer suburbs, others find peace in rural areas and we happen to live on an island. There are families that live in busses, cars, tents and yurts...Whether or not a certain lifestyle 'works' and is 'easy' really depends on the person and, pun intended, what floats their boat.

Shirtless, dirty, and swinging fearlessly from a rope on a tree. As it should be!

Me? I wouldn't change how we live for the world. If I had a dime for each time I heard, "What a fantastic way to grow up!" I'd have that three cabin monohull we've been eyeing. And I completely agree! We thrive on the living with less and I believe our unconventional lifestyle is doing incredible things for our girls in these very formative years. We have less in many ways, but in others we have so much more. Each challenge is an incubator for thought, growth, and integrity. There are many >>side effects to the way we live<<, and most of them are positive.

Is is harder? A little. Is it worth it? Totally.

* Big thank you to Facebook follower, Chris Wick, for asking this question and inspiring this post!

"Aren't You Worried about Them Falling Overboard?" Real and Imagined Fears of Living Aboard with Three Toddlers

We live on a 44 foot sail boat with our three toddlers age four and under. Considering this living arrangement falls well outside the range of "normal" for most land-dwelling folks, we get a lot of questions. But no question do we field so much as: "Aren't you afraid of them falling overboard?!" While, yes, the fact that we are surrounded by water combined with the reality that not one of our three children can swim unaided yet falls in the "Big F***ing Deal" category, you might be surprised to learn that, no, we almost never worry about them falling off the boat.

(insert sound of record scratching)

Don't get me wrong, our kids going overboard is our greatest concern and, potentially, our worst nightmare. But "worry" about it? No. So...why? A few reasons, really: 1) They are constantly supervised by an adult when they are on deck, not to mention well contained by protective netting around our boat's perimeter and 2) the water is warm and clear here so if they did happen to fall in, particularly because they are always under close watch, one of us would be able to retrieve them in a matter of seconds. Would we worry about this more if we were living in the Arctic where you have only moments in the water before hypothermia sets in, or if we lived somewhere where water was brackish and murky? Probably. But here? Not so much. And finally, 3) our girls have grown up on and around boats. It's natural and normal to them. They know how to move and maneuver like little pros, and furthermore know the "rules" and don't climb the lifelines or venture to the 'off limits' area of our boat. We are very frank with our daughters and mince no words when it comes to their understanding of safety. We tell it like it is: "If you fall in the water, you will sink like a stone to the bottom of the ocean." Sure, that might sound a little harsh, but a healthy dose of fear has a very real place in this particular scenario. We don't worry about them falling overboard at anchor any more than we would worry about our boat suddenly springing a leak. Sure, it's possible. But it certainly doesn't keep us up at night.

Underway it's similar. Our girls are never more than four feet from a parent, usually in the cockpit with Scott and I, and always in their lifejackets. We are lucky to live in a cruising area where we don't see big seas or rough weather, and if weather is inclement you won't find us sailing. On nice days, I often venture on deck with the girls to have dance parties during a smooth passage and they love to be on in the open air, watching the water for dolphins and turtles and waving hello at other boats. While we still allow them a little freedom to explore, the rules are a more stringent underway because man overboard drills in even the most pleasant conditions can be challenging, particularly if you're retrieving a small child (if a child were to go in, I'd immediately jump in after her and Scott would bring the boat back, fyi). I have zero interest in ever experiencing this horror, so our #1 rule is to stay on the boat. Period. We don't climb the rigging. We don't run. If it's rough we do not leave the cockpit and no one is allowed on deck without a parent present. Our girls understand that they must maneuver carefully and use one hand for the boat and one hand for themselves while the boat is underway. If we move between the bow of the boat and the cockpit I usually walk with them while the other two are seated securely on deck holding on to hand rails. "Always hold on," I remind them sternly. "You must always be holding on to the boat when we are moving." And they do. We are cautious, calculated and careful, but worried about them going overboard? Not really.

So where do we get a little fearful? Where does worry come into play?

Three words: At the dock.

A dock gives off false security and makes many of us feel okay because - hey, it's a dock! It's stable and safe and people and boats are around! But, no. All it would take is for one child to get out of my view and run off (it doesn't take long, believe me) and the repercussions could be disastrous. Keeping tabs on three (very active and curious) children is not always easy. While the marina does provide some security in that we have a whole community of people who watch after our girls from afar and more than once I have had a friend help me capture a runaway child, it's more of a perk and not something I count on. I am cautious and constantly doing the 'head count' if they are walking free (I am not to the point of leashes yet, but holy crap I'm close!) There are serious hazards on docks; a child might trip over a hose, a cleat or a line and fall in unnoticed, might try to balance or climb up a piling and slip over. She might see something in the water and try to reach it and topple in. Or maybe try to board a boat and misjudge the step. Any of these situations could be compounded by a good knock on the head during a tumble, rendering her unconscious and in the water... I could go on and on with scenarios but the bottom line is: these are potentially life and death situations. These are things we don't mess around with. These are the thoughts that, if I let them, keep me awake at night.

Because of these very real dangers, we have a strict lifejacket rule when on the dock and unless our girls are attached to our person or in their stroller , they are (almost always) in life jackets when walking around. Because they are so used to the rule, they often put them on themselves and with little protest. It's normal and understood. Other marina rules? They are never allowed to get on or off a boat without adult help or supervision. If we want to look at something in the water, we lie on our bellies to do so (it's much harder to fall head first into the water from a laying position than from a kneeling one). When running we keep a healthy distance from the edge so a normal trip doesn't turn into a swim. These rules were drilled into my head like "please" and "thank you" when I was a cruising kid and I've passed them onto our children. With these few safety measures in place, we certainly feel better, but I'd be lying if I said there was zero worry. It's amplified because I am chasing around three kids, usually by myself, two of whom are twins with a penchant for running in opposite directions just to mess with me - so I am always on high alert. When they run around with their lifejackets on? I worry less. WAY less. In fact, I'm pretty laid back about their wanderings as long as I can see them and know they will float. "Oh, they're so close to the water!" someone will tell me with concern in their voice, "Aren't you afraid they'll fall in?" they ask. "If they do," I start, "They will float and they certainly won't do it again!" The onlookers don't typically share my cavalier attitude and laugh nervously as they pass. But my thinking is this: worst case scenario, one of my girls falls in and gets a good scare. I fish them out (no doubt in front of a large gasping audience whispering #momoftheyear), give them a cuddle and we carry on with our day after a good rinse and change of clothes. Of course I don't want this to happen, but I'm all about kids exploring and learning natural consequences as long as the consequences aren't dire. If my girls are wearing life jackets, my worry is almost nil. Almost.

***

We take the safety of our children very, very seriously and I'm doing risk analysis while watching my kids play a hundred times a day. Bad things can happen. Accidents happen. We know that. Risks are everywhere on both land and sea. We do not, however, let a fear of "what if" rule our life. If that was the attitude we maintained, we'd never have left on a sailboat in the first place. For the most part, we let our kids be kids and give them a long leash to explore their capabilities and the world around them. Our girls climb up our mast and hang out on the boom. They swing from trees with ropes. They scale walls, climb like monkeys and run with hopeless abandon. Sure, they have the bumps, scrapes and bruises to prove it, but it's pure fact that humans learn by doing and so - with some simple rules in place and supervision from afar - we let them do. Our parenting style is to teach rather than dissuade, to empower rather than frighten. We do this, in part, by managing our own worry. Our goal - like most parents - is to raise happy, independent, confident children who trust the power of their bodies and minds, and who have a healthy respect for - but are not afraid of - the world around them. So, sure, like every parent - we worry. We worry about a million things like their happiness, health and success in life...But we don't really worry about them falling off the boat.

Sailing; in lifejackets (always) and one hand for the boat, one hand for themselves.

Always on our bellies to look at the water (Thank you Cindy W. for this tip!!)

When we're dock walkin', we are wearing life jackets. (and going opposite ways)

Practicing climbing, problem-solving, and balance. 

Looking out over the water, our fender was on the deck but usually they are never leaning over life lines.

I rigged up a line from the mast to the bow and it provided a TON of entertainment.  

When sailing on a nice day, this is how you will usually find the girls and I. 

Haven and Mira Turn Two: Beach Party!

For someone who loves a good party, I'm not very good at planning them. So when it dawned on me that the twins were turning two in less than 48 hours and we had nothing planned (will I ever learn?), I scrambled to get something together. While, on the one hand, they were only turning two and really didn't know what all the fuss was about, on the other hand, they were turning two and a little party was in order. So, as one does when you live on the water, we hit the beach. One advantage of island life is the fact people aren't so over-scheduled and busy that finding attendants for a last minute, thrown together party isn't really a problem. Another factor in our favor was that their birthday fell on a Sunday, so most people had the day off and our neighborhood friends weren't in school. And finally, having the beach bar available to make drinks for the adults and pizzas for the kiddos didn't hurt. My parents had brought down the presents we ordered, and my dad had stocked up on birthday horns, hats and decor, so all we really needed was a venue and some guests. I sent out a few messages, grabbed some cake mixes and frosting and we called it a party. A party it was!

But before I delve into the festivities...a word on my twinkles. I cannot believe they are two. It seems only yesterday we had their first birthday party in St. John, and not that much longer before that we got the news that I was cooking two in my womb while in Grenada. Haven and Mira have been my greatest challenge to date, and as with all great challenges, have bestowed upon me the greatest lessons and rewards. Being a mom to twins has changed me in a million ways, but more than anything I am blown away by the love I have for these little fish and the immense amount of joy they bring me. I never thought it would be possible to love two little people - born minutes apart, yet polar opposites - equally (I mean, surely there must be a favorite, right?) But, no. My absolute adoration of each of them knows no bounds. They are also an interesting lesson in genetics as they share not a single feature down to their fingernail beds... But it's their spirits and personalities - also very different yet equally enticing - that have captivated me as of late...It's why I love toddlers so very much; this hyper awareness that these tiny people actually have their own minds, thoughts and desires and - despite what science might tell you - a lot of it is hard wired! Their curiosity, the way they look at the world, how joyful they are at the simplest things, watching their brains soak up the world around them like sponges...it's incredible. Being a mom to our three girls is my life's greatest joy. Sorry to get all mushy, but it really is.

Haven has developed into the feistiest little cutie you have ever seen, not that it's much of a surprise since she's been hell on wheels since day one. She is incredibly strong - in both will and body - and parenting her spirit has taken some adjusting. But as demanding as she can be, she is the easiest to make smile, her laugh is infectious and she will almost never say no to a big hug and kiss. Her little light shines so bright and, when she is happy, she is joy personified. She is so excited about everything and knows no fear. She is mischievous and precocious and so much fun. Her exuberance and energy are unmatched, and she is pure beauty and magic. Mira, more mellow and pensive, is equally as spirited, but in a more understated way. Incredibly pensive and bright, she flies under the radar. Everyone who meets her comments on how thoughtful she is, and how they can just see the wheels turning behind her gorgeous eyes. Her beautiful little face has a thousand expressions and every single day she shows me more sweetness and truth behind her complexity. She is a lover, and when she trusts you, you will be privy to the greatest cuddles you have ever gotten. Oftentimes when we are on the boat, Isla and Haven will be playing with their toys, while Mira and I lay on the settee, just snuggling away. She melts my heart a million times a day.

These two little creatures could not be more different, and yet - I love them equally. Each day I think I love them more, which seems impossible. People ask me all the time how I stay at home with them day in and day out, encourage me to get a nanny, to send them to daycare so I can get a break...and while I do have my bad days, and while I do long for more time to do the things I want (I am researching ways to get "me" breaks), I truly cherish this time with my girls. I love that we are a tight little family tribe and I adore watching the bond between them - three different dynamics in all - flourish. "It's only a short window of time that they are this young" I remind people. "This will go by in the blink of an eye." So, for now, I dedicate most of my hours and most of myself to them. And it's my pleasure.

Anyway...

I took a ton of pictures on their birthday (I treated myself to a new lens - 24mm pancake lens - and tried it out on this special day) and so I will let those tell the story....

Grandpa came over with Grandma bright and early with round one of birthday hats! Having them here was so special.

Haven was very excited by the dump trucks we got her to play with at the beach!

We all had breakfast at our favorite place, Gennekers, at Nanny Cay.

Claire - one of our fave waitresses - even treated the girls to cupcakes! But not until each one gave her a kiss!

After breakfast we took a hike up to Sage Mountain with my parents. More on this in another post! It was beautiful.

During naptime, I made cupcakes and cake, and Scott and our neighborhood friends decorated!

Look at all these sweet monkeys! They *really* enjoyed the leftover icing!!

These two sweeties made this awesome sign/card for the girls, which now stays in their room.

Each twin got her own Melissa & Doug sand baking set (believe me, getting two is much better than one when it comes to twins!)

Isla, of course, helped both of them open their present!

Our sweet boat kid neighbor made this awesome, healthy snack to bring to the party.

The party in full swing. It was laid back, casual, and pretty perfect if you ask me!

Mira was particularly adorable on this day. We LOVE our sport wagon , btw!

Despite getting her own sand toys for her birthday, Haven opted to play with those another kid brought. Typical.

Pizza party on the beach. What could be better?

Our sweet friend, Albertine (I met her and her lovely husband doing laundry one night), loving up little Mira.

My dad did all the decorating, how sweet was that? The theme (if you can call it that) was My Little Pony.

Adults and kiddos having fun.

The staff of the beach bar have all become like family to us, this is our buddy, Garth, slinging drinks for the party.

Isla and the newest neighborhood kid playing away. These two are pretty darn cute together!

Haven and her million dollar smile. This kid can turn on the charm like none other!

Daddy and Isla having a chat on the swings.

Every now and then someone notices that I am taking all the pics and snaps one of me. My beautiful friend and I!

The girls had SO much fun with their new Hello Kitty beach ball!

Having doing her best "monkey hug" on Grandpa.

These two together...sigh...it's amazing. The twin bond is really something. (when they are not fighting, of course!)

Face full of sand, dirt and cake. Life is good!

Wait..there's more cake? Time to sing!

The girls were excited for this part, but weren't really sure what it was all about. 

This, however, she is VERY sure about. Haven speaks fluent "cupcake". I think she had five on this day!

A little twin moment. Would love to know what they are saying to each other!

More cupcakes...well, why not!!

This cake turned more into a smash cake than anything.

Are you counting the cupcakes?!?

Haven trying to explain that, no, she will not share her cupcake with our good friend, Kevin.

The end of the night came fast and we had to get the cuties home, bathed and in bed. One final picture with her adoring grandma. A great day had by all!