Beach, Please: On Playing Goldilocks, Island Style

It never ceases to amaze me how far away we can feel from it all on this island. Despite being a pretty primo travel destination with hundreds of thousands of people flocking here every year, the island remains deceivingly underdeveloped. We are big enough to get a decent haircut or a meal, but not too big that our streets are lined with big box stores or restaurant chains. This delicate balance of maintaining island "authenticity" and halting over-development is something that is pretty unique to the British Virgin Islands and is largely >>> why we chose this island <<< to settle on. Case in point: we can venture to to any number of absolutely pristine beaches - I'm talking jaw-droppingly beautiful shorelines that are the stuff magazine ads are made of - and more often than not we will find ourselves alone or with no more than a few others on a massive stretch of sand. No need to stake out a spot, pay for an umbrella and put down your blanket. The threat of anyone stealing your valuables while you swim is slim to none. And, no, you will not hear the Macarena blasting over a large speaker here... It's just you, me, and the sea, baby...

Back to the Boat, Back on Island Time: On Adaptation and Change

It never ceases to amaze me just how adaptable children are. After two months back in the US at my mom's house, I was certain we'd have a little "adjustment" period back at the boat. The girls, after all, are getting bigger, older, and can most certainly grasp the difference between a boat and a house, not to mention the concept of personal space. They loved being back at Grandma's. They have friends back there, we fell into a nice little routine, and - most concerning for me - they became pretty accustomed to life in a three bedroom ranch. They played tag every morning, hid under beds and behind drapery...they enjoyed their own rooms and had plenty of drawers each for their clothes (on the boat they have the equivalent of one small drawer each and only the twins have their own dedicated 'room'). They played in the back yard on the tire swing, pushed baby doll strollers down hallways, and rode bikes and trikes a plenty...Bringing them back to the boat meant a lot of this stuff was going to come to an abrupt halt.

So you can imagine my surprise when, after over a week of being back, I have yet to hear of a single complaint about anything we left back home (minus grandma, of course). I haven't heard any lamentations over the lack of a backyard or whining that they miss the library, nor have the girls put in requests for anything that I thought they might miss - from food to toys - from their time up north. They haven't even asked for television (which was something we admittedly watched significantly more of back in the house). I was, at the very least, prepared for a few sleepless nights as they re-acclimated with their old beds, but, no. In fact, they fell back into napping and night sleeping better than they did these last two months on land! I have to say I was shocked. Each time we have a transition like this I brace myself for a fallout, for tantrums and wonky adjustment periods - and yet - they never happen.  It's incredible and once again our girls show me that mama needs to take a chill pill. "I have no idea why this still surprises me" I told my mom on the phone the other day. "They just fall back into step." To which she replied with her motherly wisdom, "Kids are very adaptable."

And they are. And it's pretty amazing.

***

The days leading up to our departure were super busy on both ends; I was busy packing up and prepping for the flights (remember, I prepare for these things like a ninja!), Scott was up to his eyeballs in work while simultaneously launching and readying Asante for our return (she was on the hard the last three months). I'm glossing over a ton of details but suffice it to say we were frenetic on both ends. The girls and I enjoyed an uneventful day of travel and landed on Tortola just as the sun was beginning to set and the tree frogs start singing their nightly tunes. Our favorite taxi driver, Larry, picked us up with a big smile and huge hugs, and soon we were en-route back to the boat.

The girls were *so* excited to be back. The boat was a flurry of energy; snuggles with daddy, finding "new" toys, running amok (as children who have been cooped up in planes for a whole day are wont to do) and preparing dinner. Meanwhile, I unpacked all our bags.

The next morning we went out to breakfast with daddy and - oh my gosh! - the girls were greeted with so many hugs and fist bumps and smiles from every direction. "Who are you people and where were you?" one fellow breakfast patron asked with a laugh, "I've never seen so many people so excited to see four girls!" It gave us the warm fuzzies to know we were missed since, truth be told, sometimes I think the presence of three very active, loud and exuberant toddlers might cramp our marina's style. It's hard to keep a low profile around here with our crew. Not everyone loves little children and I can respect that - but according to the various workers, wait staff and crew members around us who repeatedly told the girls, "Nanny Cay just wasn't the same without you!" we were missed. And I believe wholeheartedly that Nanny Cay wasn't the same, if for no other reason than it was a lot more quiet!

***

Being back has been amazing and totally rejuvenating. And, okay, it's not all been smooth sailing; my car got a flat on the first day I drove it and I also discovered I can no longer get out of the driver's side door without rolling down the window and opening it from the outside (#islandcars). Other than those minor nuisances, life is good. Scott is busier than ever at the moment, we are down pretty much all our captains this month so he is pulling double duty and burning the midnight oil every night to stay on top of everything. I am so incredibly proud of him and how he's managing because it is not easy. Meanwhile, the girls and I have fallen right back into swing. We have our little routine of breakfast on the boat followed by some morning outing/activity/playdate, then lunch and nap time around noon, then our afternoon outing/activity/playdate followed by dinner, bath and bedtime between 7 and 7:30pm. Of course there are variations and special occasions, but that's the gist of it. Lots of fresh air, playtime with other children, and glorious sunshine. The pool and beach are regulars in our days and then there's the beach bar, which in the afternoon is a hub of activity and where I can let the girls run free with their little friends to climb trees, swing from ropes, build with the beach jenga blocks or hold scooter races. It's simple, no fluff, fun. And mommy can have her afternoon spritzer or two (wink).

Speaking of scooters, our Micro Scooters have now become the preferred method of travel for the girls. These days, instead of me pushing a double stroller to and fro most of the time, you will find our little gang ripping around the marina like little skater girls. It's pretty hilarious to watch because they are so small and so fast, that it's rare for anyone who passes not to smile or giggle because they look so damn cute all in a row squealing and laughing. Yet another reminder of how fast time flies and how with every month a new milestone is reached when kids are little. There is no way I would have trusted them to fly around here a few months ago, but now - it's how they roll and they love the independence. Of course they are wearing their life jackets while doing so - they get ahead of me so quickly now and the threat of falling in is more imminent - the life jackets put my mind and heart at ease. "If they fall in, they'll float" I tell onlookers. Bumps, bruises and scrapes don't phase me. In fact I encourage those things with our girls. But water safety is no joke. Even though the girls know our "rules" and have excellent control over their rides, it's better to be safe than sorry. That PSA aside...we love our "scooter boards" (as Mira likes to call them, oh yeah - the twins are full on talking now!) and if you are looking for a great scooter for your child, you seriously need to check Micro Scooters out.

***

So that is where we are at. It's been a pretty great re-entry to boat life and we have been welcomed back to our adopted island with open arms. Life is simple and we are happy. The fact that our girls have made this transition easy makes me very proud of them and I sure hope that this flexibility continues into adulthood for them (it's a trait that doesn't come as naturally to their mother *coughcough*). Change is not always easy and rarely is it effortless, but it is good. And adaptability is what can make it great. Being back on island, back to our floating home? It's exactly what we needed.

Now...how they will handle pre-school three half-days out of the week? That adjustment might prove a little more difficult, for all of us!

Tiny space? No big deal to these kids. In fact, I think they prefer close quarters!

Always a great option for a morning activity

Scooter races are the afternoon activity of choice on many days

This is what I call the "Meyers Mimosa" - soda water and orange juice. 

Swinging from trees is always fun!

We spend a lot of time crafting and coloring as well, but these mess free Water Wow's are my fave!

"How old is that little girl?" is a question I get all the time about our fearless little Haven.

This is our backyard. I mean...what a view to take in every day. I love it.

Back to the baby pool bath on the aft deck - and we've now discovered that Joy dish soap makes the BEST bubbles. Score!

Beaching it in our SwimZip Swimwear SPF rash guards. Love our little beach babies.

Good bye sun, thanks for a great day! So happy to be able to catch the sunset every night again.

Transitioning Back to Life Afloat: Boat, Sweet Boat

We're back on the boat. Big transitions like this are rarely seamless, particularly if you have little kids in tow, but our move back to boat life went about as smooth as we could have hoped, despite Mira's ear infection that (thankfully) presented itself two days before we flew and the fact that I forgot to pack underwear (!?!). Our day of travel - thanks to luck, excessive preparation, and lessons learned - went really well, minus that forty-five minutes we were detained by customs here in the BVI due to a paperwork glitch. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't call it a "piece of cake" ("exhausting" is more like it), but we had no melt downs on the planes and we even got a few "You're girls are so well behaved!" comments from fellow passengers which is always wonderful to hear as a parent.

Last flight of our very long day!

Much of our "success" can be attributed to this woman, my amazing mom. Thank you, mom!

Scott picked us up from the airport and the girls were so happy to see him. I didn't publicize it for obvious reasons, but I had been single momming it for three weeks and the girls were beyond thrilled to see daddy's smiling face again. They were all squeals, kisses and giggles. We got our passports stamped,  loaded our stuff into the car and headed for the marina. When we arrived at the boat, our two large boxes we'd shipped earlier were there, and those boxes - along with our five giant duffles - filled the salon of our boat. Me being slightly OCD about order and tidiness got to unpacking immediately. The girls were punch drunk and overtired from their long day of travel, but super excited to be back on the boat amongst all their old toys which, in our absence, regained all their luster. With them entertained, I unpacked and organized like a Tasmanian devil. I really wish I'd had the forethought to take a 'before' and 'after' photo of our salon, but my tunnel vision of "Must. Organize. Home." pretty much took over and my work was certainly cut out for me. Within two hours our boat looked like her old self, and I started the process of getting the girls in bed. Not gonna lie, I impressed myself.

Isla was super excited about being back in her "bunk" bed. The twins? Not so much. They were visibly terrified to go back in the v-berth and screamed holy hell while I peeled them off my person to put into bed. It broke my heart and I had that moment of, "What have I done to our children?!" The first couple of nights were very rough, with many wakings and little sleep. I resorted to co-sleeping up there with them just to calm their fears and was so worried we were in for a major sleep regression, when we they had just started sleeping through the night back home. Luckily, each night has gotten progressively better and now we are not only on the local time (which is two hours ahead of what we were on) but we have no more tears and, last night, the twins slept through the night, from 6:30pm to 6:45am! There is hope for me yet!

The transition was much easier for Isla, who is a traveling pro now and was VERY excited about her bunk bed.

While I knew in my heart of hearts that coming back to the boat and our adopted island of Tortola would be a good thing, there's always butterflies in my tummy preceding big changes. Being back though? It's been amazing. Nanny Cay, the marina where we live, is fantastic. Not only are the services and facilities top-notch, but there is a bonafide community of wonderful people and children here. We definitely still get the transient nature that is synonymous with marina living, but it's really nice to know that there is a core group of people and children that we can call friends. I really can't say enough good things about this place.

Not a bad view to have in your back yard!

The Nanny Cay Beach, where many, many hours will be spent!

Isla has instantly fallen back in with her old crowd of little friends. These kids, some who live aboard and some who live in the condos on the premises, range in age between eight and thirteen are the most welcoming, sweetest kids ever. Isla runs off with them and they swing her around, play soccer with her, carry her on their shoulders and they've sort of adopted her as a little sister which makes my heart so happy to see. She positively thrives in their company. You know what else is awesome? I have never, ever seen one of these kids on a cell phone or computer. They're outside; playing on the beach, swinging in the trees, sailing their dinghies of the beach and simply kids being kids. It's incredibly refreshing and any doubts that lurked in my mind about brining our girls down here to raise were immediately erased when I saw the interaction between Isla and these children. I love it. Everyone we've talked to has told us, "It's an idyllic place to raise a child" and I can believe that.

The best part? After two years (and three kids!) we have reunited with the Sunkissed Soeters, the family that we cruised with for months and months (click the link to see Isla and Stormer 'before' photos!) back in the day. The connection we have with this family is really hard to articulate - they are truly more like family than friends - and when we last parted we swore that we would be together again. Hundreds of online chats and hours of Skype conversations later, here we are together again. And we are neighbors! Isla and Stormer, raised almost like siblings for about eight months haven't missed a beat. It's like no time has passed and they have fallen right back into step, chatting away, holding hands while waking down the dock, and demanding play dates in the few hours a day that we are not together. It's wonderful. Finding and being surrounded by your "tribe" is a real key to happiness in this life, I think.

We caught their dinghy line when they came to check in. Cannot even tell you how happy we all were!

These two have a special bond and started playing again like no time had passed!

So we are here. We're getting settled and it's been wonderful. There's so much excitement on the horizon, so much to learn and so many adventures to have. Of course there are kinks to work out and new routines to develop. We are getting our bearings again and - all in all - life is good and I am so, so happy to be back. Our cup runneth over. Thank you all for your well-wishes and support, it means so much to us. More to come!